Breaking News: Tish Cyrus Discovers Smoking After Explosive Ride with Miley! 🚍💥
In a shocking (yet somehow unsurprising) revelation, Tish Cyrus, the mother of America’s favorite pop wrecking ball, Miley Cyrus, has boldly declared that her entry into the smoky underworld of marijuana was sparked (no pun intended) during a leisurely joyride on Miley’s lavish Bangerz tour. Because what better way to bond with your daughter than setting a tour bus ablaze, right? 🎤🔥
During an enlightening episode of the hit podcast “Call Her Daddy,” Tish, who treated her lungs like precious, uncharred treasures for most of her life, bravely opened up about the pivotal moment when she realized that being a “responsible adult” might not include avoiding plants once deemed the "gateway drug” – another term for “Dad’s secret stash.” 🌱🤷♀️
Picture this: Tish and her crew chilling out on a fancy new tour bus, living their best lives until—drumroll, please—one of the tires weakens and transforms into the automotive version of an overdramatic diva. Yep, you guessed it: fire, smoke, and chaos erupted in spectacular fashion. Just three minutes in (because everyone knows that’s how long it takes for an unsuspecting bus to morph into a fiery deathtrap), their ride turned into what can only be described as a scene from a low-budget action movie. 👀🎬💥
"My pajamas, my laptop, everything burnt!” Tish exclaimed, clearly more upset about her lost wardrobe than the smoldering hulk of transportation. Because really, it’s hard to find good pajama sets these days! 🙄🛌
The timing was impeccable; Tish’s attempt at waking up her other daughter, Noah (who presumably was snoozin’ away because this is a rock and roll family, after all), was thwarted by the flaming inferno that was apparently very excited to remind everyone that fire doesn’t discriminate: it just wants to consume your things in spectacular fashion.
So there you have it, folks! Forget the conventional paths to enlightenment; sometimes, the universe tells you to “light it up” in the most dramatic way possible. Or in Tish’s case, it said, “Welcome to the club!" Now that she’s rolling in smoke, we’re left to wonder — what’s next? The family reality show “Cyrus Does Cannabis”?! Tune in next week for more outrageous antics and questionable life choices! 🍃🎉
🚨 Disclaimer Alert! 🚨
Before you start drafting conspiracy theories on your fridge with magnets—just know this is satire! For the actual, no-nonsense, non-bong-infused version of this news story, head over to , okmagazine.com (where facts wear suits and don’t tell jokes).
We highly recommend reading both versions—one for the truth, and one for the chaotic energy you didn’t know you needed. 😆🔥
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