Breaking News: Lesotho’s Medical Cannabis Situation — A Triumph of Buds and Bureaucracy!
In a plot twist that no one saw coming (except maybe your uncle who’s been staving off his existential dread with an impressive stash), Lesotho has crowned itself the cannabis kingpin of Africa! Yes, you heard that right. For over two decades, this charming mountainous kingdom has been rolling in the green stuff — the medicinal kind, of course. And they’re not just in it to boost their 2023 Plant Parent of the Year awards; they’ve turned cannabis into their third source of revenue! Sorry wool and diamonds, but you’re just not as “lit” as a good ol’ joint!
The United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (because what else could they possibly need to monitor?), informs us that a whopping 70% of the marijuana puffed in South Africa is fresh from Lesotho. Talk about a 420-friendly export! If you’re South African and feeling particularly euphoric, you might just want to thank Lesotho for playing the game of ‘who can grow the most questionable plant’!
Now, let’s talk about the delicate art of adhering to legal standards. Because why just grow weed when you can also fulfill the role of a botanist and a chemist? Lesotho diligently removes most traces of tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), the compound that famously transforms couch potatoes into philosophical cats. The result? They’re left with a product that’s primarily made of the chill-just-gather-round cannabidiol (CBD) and a mere 0.03% THC. Yes, that’s right! If you’re looking for a head rush, you might as well be sniffing at the bottle of multi-vitamins in your kitchen cabinet!
So, here’s to Lesotho — where the grass is always greener, the buds are always blooming, and the wrinkles of legality are expertly smoothed over with a dash of improbable ingenuity! With Ben & Jerry’s ‘euphoric’ flavor of cannabis dreams on one end and Lesotho’s love affair with strict legality on the other, who needs a congress of politicians when you can have a battle of horticulturists instead? Cheers to growing stuff that makes everyone feel good — even if it’s just the intention and a sprinkle of CBD!
🚨 Disclaimer Alert! 🚨
Before you start drafting conspiracy theories on your fridge with magnets—just know this is satire! For the actual, no-nonsense, non-bong-infused version of this news story, head over to , www.enca.com (where facts wear suits and don’t tell jokes).
We highly recommend reading both versions—one for the truth, and one for the chaotic energy you didn’t know you needed. 😆🔥
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