Breaking News: Detroit Lions and Marijuana Go for the Gold!
In a groundbreaking display of sportsmanship (and sheer recreational creativity), the Detroit Lions are facing off against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and it seems the only thing that could be more exciting than the game itself is the ultimate weed-themed throwdown courtesy of Pleasantrees, the local cannabis company with enough creativity to rival Picasso—if Picasso painted with pot instead of paint!
This weekend, as the Lions march onto the field, Pleasantrees is rolling out billboards of sass along Interstate 75 that read, “Tampa Bay Smokes Hemp. Let’s Go Detroit!” Yes, folks, that’s right! While the Bucs bask in the warm sunshine of Florida where the most exciting thing they’ve got is a medical marijuana card, we in Michigan—where “Hey, you got the munchies?” is a legitimate greeting—are here to remind them that we’ve officially left legal highs in the dust. Who knew the battle for playoff supremacy would also turn into a battle for Best Cannabis Caption?
Pleasantrees, led by entrepreneur Bryan Wickersham, decided to venture into the world of sports smack talk, evidently unbothered by the possibility of Tampa fans retaliating with signs reading, “Your Ice Cream is Cold!” or “We Have Citrus!” (which, if you ask a Michigander, is basically fighting words). Wickersham even claims, “Everybody’s raging with Lions fever right now,” and not just from the nachos at the game. No sir, it’s an actual recreational fever that no amount of Tampa humidity can combat!
Before you rush to fill your social media feeds with puns, let’s not forget: this isn’t Pleasantrees’ first rodeo in “billboard wars.” Earlier, they unleashed “Los Angeles Smokes Mids. Let’s Go Detroit” – a not-so-subtle jab at California’s less-than-stellar mid-grade cannabis. That billboard, folks, is like driving past a taco truck only to find out they’ve run out of salsa. Just cruel!
But hold onto your bongs; it gets even better! While most companies are busy running boring ads about proper dental hygiene or yogurt with a hundred flavors, Pleasantrees shows us that advertising can be fun, cheeky, and potentially lead to Charges of Outrageousness in Friendly Sports Rivalries. They’re rolling forward (pun intended) to not only promote their business but to destigmatize cannabis use, one heady billboard at a time. Who needs news anchors when you can have a belly laugh while stuck in traffic?
Despite the high-level comedy (another pun, we know—you’re welcome), not everyone gets the jokes yet. Sorry, Wickersham’s mom! We’re just hoping the Tampa fans will catch the drift and not start a “Citrus Fair” in response, showcasing all things grapefruit with a hint of bitterness.
And let’s not forget about the potential future ads: Should the Lions triumph over the Bucs, we hear rumblings of “Green Bay Smokes Cheese,” which is basically the cannabis equivalent of unleashing the kraken on your rival.
So, as we gear up for this playoff showdown, remember that it’s not just a battle of touchdowns; it’s a flamboyant festival of flavor, weed, and witticisms that none of Florida’s best oranges could ever hope to compete with. Whether you’re cheering from the stands or stuck in traffic, let’s just hope we keep winning both on the field and in the world of witty billboarding. Go Lions!
Disclaimer: Please, no actual smoking while driving. Let’s leave the multitasking to the professionals (or shall we say, “smokin’ hot fans”).
🚨 Disclaimer Alert! 🚨
Before you start drafting conspiracy theories on your fridge with magnets—just know this is satire! For the actual, no-nonsense, non-bong-infused version of this news story, head over to , www.freep.com (where facts wear suits and don’t tell jokes).
We highly recommend reading both versions—one for the truth, and one for the chaotic energy you didn’t know you needed. 😆🔥
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